Below, please find my very unoriginal and irate email to ESPN yesterday regarding their stupid blackout tonight and their response.

Dear Jenny,

ESPN has exclusivity on Sunday Nights, per our agreement with MLB, and tonight’s showcase will be on Reds/Braves. We will provide Tigers/Red Sox updates within Baseball Tonight at 7 p.m. ET and Sunday Night Baseball.

Sincerely,

Katy
ESPN Viewer Response

———————- Original Message ———————-

Dear ESPN,

I’m not even a Red Sox or a Tigers Fan and I’ve been waiting to see this game, it’s a total pitchers duel.

Instead, due to your blackout, no one in the United States will be able to watch the game.

You have 5 billion channels, most of which just play softball, so why not play the Red Sox/Tigers game on one of them and avoid a total boycott of your channel?

Thanks,

Jenny

Edited to add - ESPN is doing the right thing and allowing the game to be viewed on NESN and FSN. GOOD call ESPN, thank you.

Things that annoy me.

1) MSNBC - for all the Keith Olbermann biz. I haven’t watched them since he left and I never will.

2) NBC - You know what? I don’t like them either. They continue to provide Jay Leno with a platform to flap his big, stupid, ass kissing mouth. FAIL.

3) Arianna Huffington - Where does she get off selling the Huffington Post - dependent upon submissions from unpaid and hardworking writers - to AOL?!!!! Also, I’m really tired of her tweeting pictures of herself at glamorous events while, ya know, people are dying in Egypt. http://www.facebook.com/heyarianna

4) Friends that cry about how broke they are, then post pictures of themselves eating out at expensive restaurants, carrying $2500 handbags. I love them, but, really? You want to see broke? Be me for a day. Bet you can’t do it, chumps.

5) Speaking of employment, or lack thereof, I am BEYOND annoyed at companies that do not respond to resumes. Not even a “we got your resume” letter. Yeah, I get it, you have 5000 applicants for every open position, but how hard is it to send out an auto-reply?

6) My cats. They are seriously getting on my nerves. One has decided that pissing outside of the box (no medical reason, btw) is awesome, and another one has decided to shit on the floor EVERY FUCKING TIME I GO TO EAT. Seriously. I sit down to eat, and he shits on my floor. I love them, but they are seriously disturbing what little calm I have left.

7) Bob Costas - he’s a permanent entry on this list for so many reasons. It should be pretty obvious.

Sigh. I have a feeling this list will only grow.

Hi!

I just thought I’d let you know that I’m a 39 year old attorney who is no longer watching MSNBC or any NBC stations/affiliates, or supporting any company owned by Comcast due to the firing of Keith Olbermann.

In fact, I’ve emailed 300 friends and family tonight asking them to do the same. According to my early calculations (on a Friday night, no less) the email has gone out to over 2,000 people by now. 

I wish you the best under the ownership of Comcast. Good luck out there guys, you’re going to need it!

A former viewer ~

Jenny XXXXX

So, a number of years ago, I was hit by a drunk driver. Allow me to elaborate - I was hit by a drunken Cubs fan on October 14, 2003, the day of the Bartman Incident. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steve_Bartman_incident

This resulted in two herniated discs in my back, one in my neck, years of physical therapy and the ever present possibility of me throwing the rotten thing out again. Like I did last week. So you can understand why I a) rip on Cubs fans constantly and b) enjoy a massage every now and again.   So, when my step-mother offered me her appointment at her massage-therapists on our recent visit to Springfield, I was quite grateful. “Huzzah,” said I, not knowing what was in store, “a massage is just the thing I need.” Little did I know the horrors that were in store for me.

Things proceeded normally for a non-medical massage. Strip, on the table, dim lights, new age music, smelly oil, chakra charts, invasive personal questions about my eating/drinking habits, etc. My step-mother had told me that this masseuse was all about the hot rock thing, so when she had me roll over, I was expecting searing hot weights to hit my back. Instead, I felt weird sliding and pressure. She then informed me that as I am such a stressed out, toxic mess and my body is essentially one giant knot, that she was pulling out the big guns and employing a method called “cupping.” A gruesome description of this process is available here  http://www.americanmassagecupping.info/

What follows is not for the weak of heart. “Free massage, sure, I’ll go with it” said I. Famous last words.

This is me covered with the evil devices. She noted that I might “have some bruising.”

This is me AFTER:

That was about 2 hours after the massage, it’s much worse now. It feels like I have 3rd degree sunburns and I look like I’ve been held prisoner by a particularly sadistic monster. So, if anyone ever tries to pull this crap on you, please learn from my fail and say no.

As Robert Heinlein would say, TANSTAAFL.